My uncle Tony is in the hospital again but this time he won't be making it out :( On June 11th my cousin David asked me to check on his dad for him sometime during the day and I did, he seemed confused, couldn't think of words and couldn't finish sentences, his face was sunken in like a very elderly mans would look like (my uncle was only 60 but he looked 80 or 90) well he finally got out that he would like me to go buy him some sherbert, for some reason I felt like he was going to fall when he reached for his cane on the floor, my uncle has post polio and just recently found out that he has hepatitis c and has sirosis of his liver, and I'm thankful that he did because when I got back over to his house he had fallen down and apparently hit his head on the concrete of his garage :( he wouldn't give me the key to his garage gate so I couldn't go in and help him so I stood there helplessly and thinking what can I do to help him, so I decided to go get my cell phone and walk across the street to get signal and call my mom who came as fast as she could, she tried to get him to give her the keys and he wouldn't, he didn't understand, he didn't know where the keys were. She borrowed my phone after I googled my cousin's work number and she asked him to come home that it was an emergency. and then she came back and she finally got my uncle to say ok to call 911 so I went and called 911. There they found his ammonia levels were high and he has pneumonia. He was in the hospital for a couple days then he came home and he reunited with his daughter after about 10 or 15 years of being mad at her, he met his grandchildren. He kept telling Toni that I saved his life that day. Claire saw that he didn't feel well so she went up to him and gave him a hug and he hugged her back, such a sweet memory of the two of them that is burned into my memory. My uncle had made up with his mom a few weeks before he went into the hospital. My cousin called on the 21st of June telling us that his dad didn't know who he was and was walking without his cane and such and what should he do, we told him to take him to the ER and his dad was pushing him into the firewood pile next to his car so mom went over and helped him, but ended up calling an ambulance once again, his ammonia levels were once again high. They put him in ICU after the first day because he was being combative and they sedated him. they put him on hospice care and gave him 2-5 days to live on Sunday (June 24th) he's still alive but he's not here, he's asleep and breathing heavy. Mom took off a week at work, his son is staying up there with him, so is his daughter, had my aunt and my cousin down for 2 days to visit him. This is hard for all of us.
My uncle was like a dad to me when my dad wasn't there for me, he'd take me places, have me help him around his house and with his garden, go to the store with him, he'd buy me Jimmy Dean Lunches back when they still had those, he didn't think Lunchables were too healthy. He stopped smoking because hannah and me and I believe emily as well gave him things to quit smoking one time for Christmas, that was a blessing. He loved the Beatles, and other music too, loved cats the most but loved all animals. I'm going to miss him, even with his many faults (like we all have).
I've got to work on feeling my emotions because I'm the type that hides them, I tend to eat my feelings and I can't do that. Even though feeling and processing through these emotions are hard and wear me out physically I need to just feel them because it's what I need to do. I don't like it but I gotta do it.
Update on my weight: I'm still juggling the same couple of pounds but I can understand why I'm just a ball of emotions this month, it's been a hard month. I don't think I'll hit my goal of 60 pounds lost by August 1st, but I'm hoping to be close to it, I'm around 41-44 pounds lost right now.
I'm really hoping and praying that we go to youth conference this year, I need it so much, I need the preaching and the fellowship that you get there. It's just such a blessing to my soul. I'm hoping that if we go that mom will let me go, because it's really the one thing that I look forward to each year that I can still go to, it's college and career age not just for high school/middle school kids. I need a break from my every day life and just recoup from all this drama that's going on in my life.
I don't know how much longer my uncle will be with us, he hasn't had food or water in at least 5 days. Please just be in prayer for my family during this hard time.
Thanks and God bless!
Mandy Marie
Even in the Valley God is Good.
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