Tom's Test

Tom Burton is in his last year of college, studying music directing and business. Since Tom comes from a wealthy family, lots of young ladies are eager to become his wife. Not knowing which one is the one for him, Tom puts each girl through a test to see whether they’re truly committed. When he realizes his tests are somewhat flawed, Tom finally turns to God for the choice. Little does he know God may have a test in store for him.







During the night today, well started last night around 11 something, I realized that I was putting people to the test, guys to the test, on how they would react to my past to see how my future spouse will react once I tell him my past.  I trusted some of them enough to tell them regardless but you know it was still wrong motives.  I  thought after I sent the emails to them, at different time periods (different months), that now I'll see how they react to it to see how my future husband will react to it.  None of them had problems with it, but you know I should never have put them through a test like in the book Tom's Test, Tom was from a wealthy family and he didn't want girls that were just after his money so he put them through the tests that he came up in his mind but the tests were always flawed in one way or another and it ended up hurting him in the end before he got right with God.  I see myself in Tom by these tests that I've given to people about my past.  Though I did not do it to harm them, I still did do it.  I hope none of them are offended by it, one I don't even talk to anymore because he is not saved.

I realized last night however that I don't have to put guy friends to the test because when the one comes my way God will make it work out, He will not give me the one and not make it work out.  I think it might upset him, the one, a little bit by some of it, but I know that if God is in it he will still love me regardless.

God is good

Through it all God is good.

Evaristo and Salvation

My Grams is on hospice care and she has people come to the house, Evaristo and Martha.

Thursday Evaristo came over, he helps my grams M-W-F, he came over to get our old water heater and to talk with my grams, Wednesday the nurse came and did vitals and whatnot and grams' heart beat was a little more irregular, the nurse shared that with Evaristo and it bothered him, cuz he likes my grams and he doesn't like it when his patients die and whatnot (he's a CNA).  He made a statement about how he hopes that his good outweighs the bad so he'll go to heaven and my grams told him i'm sure it will.  That right there burdened my heart.  I knew he was not saved.  God burdened my heart to write him a letter explaining salvation to him and adding 2 tracts in it (one is a cartoon form and the other was a just written form).  I explained that salvation is by grace through faith in Jesus Christ, that we don't go to heaven by anything that we have done.  and I gave him the letter on Friday after praying over it, praying that God saves Evaristo and things along that nature, but I was worried about his reaction.  I tweeted something about it and my friend tweeted back and said God's Word never returns void, and that gave me comfort.  Monday he came in and he seemed like he was under conviction, on his way out (grams had no idea that i had given him a letter) he said thank you Mandy for the letter it was very enlightening.  Grams asked what did i tell him in the letter and I said I thanked him for caring for you and I explained salvation to him. and she said that's nice, or something along that line.  I shared with Mrs Martin last night what I did and she thought I did the right thing and that I should invite him to church or if he didn't mind if Pastor came out to see him or whatnot, I believe Evaristo is Catholic.  Today Grams was upset about it, that I shouldn't have given him that letter that I had no right to judge if he was saved or not and just things like that.  that she has to straighten it all out now because he looked upset about it (which to me that looked like conviction) she told me that I'm pushing away people from Christ, turning them away.  We aren't to judge and whatnot.  But I know that I did the right thing, that God impressed upon my heart to do that, He burdened my heart about it. And I have learned the hard way that if you don't do God's will, what He has burdened your heart you end up with no peace and no joy among other things, so I obeyed God's burden He placed upon my heart.  Grams said today that you witness when your on a witnessing field, and my mind went straight to the saying that once you step outside those church doors you are in your mission field.  Grams said he doesn't come here for that, but the woman at the well didn't come for salvation yet she left with it.  Christ meets you in the way.  If no one witnessed at times that weren't appointed to witness at then no one would get saved.

Please pray for Evaristo, Andrew (his son who is about 3ish), and Cindy his wife that they get saved.  Pray that grams heart opens up and if she isn't saved that she gets saved.  With the way she talks and acts I do not believe that she is saved.

Job, Bible College, and Laptop

Today I got the desire to get a new laptop when I had the money, but then I realized that this one that I have right now is still working, the spring has sprung on the left mouse button but other than that it is ay oh kay. So I decided that once I save enough money for Bible College that I will take and get me a new laptop that I will use during my time there, hopefully Heartland Baptist Bible College in Oklahoma City if they accept me, I know that my Pastor would be okay with that school already.

Job:  My family and I are looking into seeing if I can get paid by the state or whoever does pay family members who stay home and care for their sick/bedridden, ect. family members, and if I were to get paid for doing that in 1 years time frame I would be able to go to Bible College for 2 years almost, that is with giving my Tithes and Missions and paying my phone bill and all the other needs I need plus a little money for me, but saving some money.  But if I can't get that then I have peace about getting a job outside of the house, though I don't like the thought of what it would do to my family, but God has called me to missions and I can not learn to be a helpmeet to my husband just sitting here at home, I wouldn't know the first thing to do if I were in a foreign field trying to start a church with my husband, whomever he may be, from scratch, I need to learn that kinda thing, sure I know the basics of a family, but I don't know all that I need to know just from staying at home, and I know that God can send me my husband here in my little town but I haven't seen it yet, so I know that I need to go off to Bible College, as I've felt that was God's will for some time now, though my desire comes and goes.

Bible College:  I feel my desire to go to Heartland coming back, in full swing, I know how hard it will be to leave once Youth Conference is over when we go up there, I already am filled with joy as I think about it and about how I could quite possibly be there in the space of a year, I have this desire that I know satan will try to pull away from me through discouragement and discontentment in the things I have because he has done that to me before, but this time with the Lord's help I will stay strong with my commitments and I really want to go to Bible College next fall, this fall is out of the question, though I wish it were not!  If I had the money I could start in January, but I would like to start in the fall.

Please pray for me as I seek God's will in these areas, of Bible College and a job.

Thank you!!!

God Bless!
Mandy Marie

God's Cure For Loneliness

Once again today I found myself in a state of loneliness, feeling alone.  I go through states of loneliness off and on. But today was different. Today I found the answer for why I get lonely and that is because of satan.  I have gained victory in one area of my life and he knows that the temptations he brings about in front of me is not working so he tries to go to another area in my life to try and make me slip up there.  The area he tried today is loneliness.  God showed me that today.  Now that I know what satan is trying to use to slip me up in my walk with God I can watch out for it, and then the cure for loneliness is none other than God's Word.  I went to God's Word to cure my loneliness, I had only read a chapter of Proverbs this morning because I was really tired and I told God that I"d read more later on today.  I had gotten caught up in the day and satan came'a knockin and he was trying to get me down, and was succeeding, he was telling me things like now all your friends are serving God and you're all alone.  I know that God is working in my friend's lives, and He is working in my life too (for which I am glad).  I know that what satan told me was a LIE and will always be a LIE.  The Bible calls satan the father of all lies, so why would I be surprised to find out that he would lie to me?  I know that I am never alone, after I got saved I have never been alone.  Jesus Christ is with me all the time, the Holy Spirit lives inside of me.  I can always run to the Father and cling to Him and get the comfort I need, the encouragement that I need.  When I go through loneliness there are other feelings/things that come along with it. 1. Discontentment and 2. Discouragement  I get discontent in where God has me and I get discouraged with that as well.  I get discontent in my friendships, in my relationships that i may have, I get discouraged in what I"m doing for the Lord, that the little things are not big enough, but I fail to realize that Little is MUCH if God is in it!  Friends, our labour is not in vain in the Lord.  That is one thing that God showed me in my reading this afternoon in Philippians.  I went to Philippians because I remembered that my Pastor said if you're ever going through a hard time or are depressed go to Philippians it will lift your soul so that is what I did.

Isn't God good?!?

I Pray that what God showed me was a blessing to you.

God bless
Mandy Marie

Africa- September 14, 2010

The book I talk about in the 1st paragraph is Sam the Sergeant, in the book he turns out to be called to Africa and the girl he is to marry, whom God betrothed him to, is surrendered to go to Africa as well.
I feel conviction upon my heart, i`ve been feeling it during the last half of the book i was reading. Im not sure what all its about though.

i know i need to not compromise, not to give in.

Back in the day i see missionary videos from like africa and it would make me tear up just seeing those kids whose parents had aids and died and they had become orphans and its just sad. I remember 1 picture in particular, it was a little boy who had lost his arm. His parents had aids and i think he did too because his mom had it and how sad it was, even know it brings tears to my eyes. I used to think maybe God was calling me to africa because when i`d see those slides it would move my heart. But i thought later on that it was a thing that mandy wanted to do, and not one of God gave it to me. I thought maybe God wanted me to go to america this past year, but im not sure about that. Im just confused.
During the service bro copeland had a boy go up to the platform and he did some things and then he dreamed about his future and said you could be a pastor, something else that i cant remember, or a missionary to africa.

I dont know if that was God`s answer to me or not, but i asked God to make His will clear to me and if He has to hit me over the head wiith it that`s okay with me lol
Around the Globe: that was the theme for the youth conference this year. they had to carry bags around on their back while they did the games or whatnot the competitions, and they went to Egypt, China and i think 1 other place and the ones who won were the ones who took off the extra baggage. there were a few people that didnt take off the baggage, they were asked to take it out and show what was in the bags one had sports equipment and another team had hairdryers and stuff to make you look pretty. i liked that skit, i could see the moral of it before brother Ted Inman said waht it was.
Lately it seems like I've been seeing Africa everywhere, it started before youth conference but not too much, but i've been seeing all these shows on tv that are about african animals in africa, my pastor went out of town yesterday after church and brother chase was preaching and in his message he mentioned sudan and the slavery there, tonight on the news they were talking about hurricane danielle and said it's more close to africa than to the us right now. it just seems like africa is everywhere. when i first told mom about me surrendering me to be a missionary she pictured me going to africa (cuz in her mind that's where all the missionaries go). In my Junior year in my goals essay we had to tell the place we wanted to live and what we would be doing in 10 years from now and guess where i placed myself being a missionary to? you guessed it---- Africa. I am not sure if God is trying to tell me through all of this that Africa is really where He wants/ed me to go or not. but it sure seems like Africa is everywhere i look. it's in the song Bury my heart on the Mission field Lord even though africa is not anywhere mentioned in that song. Grams told me the day after I got back from youth conference that there were 10 missionaries killed in Africa because they were carrying their Bible and the africans thought they were trying to convert them and my first thought besides that's sad is someone has to replace them. Brother Cecil Ballard told us when he was preaching at Pot-O-Gold Youth camp in 02 that who is going to fill their shoes? He had had all the preachers and their wives come up to the stage and take their shoes off and then he said who is going to fill their shoes and in my heart i felt like if i dont who will? What if God is calling me to Africa? I think it would be neat yes, but it's awful scary if you think about it, those 10 missionaries died because they were sharing their faith (i'm not sure who they were or what faith they were) what if that were to happen to me? but the Bible tells us in John 12:25 "He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal." that's not the verse i'm thinking of lol wait a second let me find it. Here we go: Matthew 10:39 "He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it." I'm not sure how that fits in there for comfort but that's what came to mind when i thought of what if that were to happen to me, that i get murdered for sharing the Gospel in africa if that is truly where God wants me to go. But you know what if I am called to africa and God decides to let me get murdered for sharing the glorious Gospel and even 1 soul gets saved it will be worth it all because Heaven rejoices over 1 sinner that gets saved.
It's in the commercials for Johnson and Johnson talking about Kenya or Sudan or something like that, they said that it created jobs here and back home, I thought they meant home was Africa and here was the US. They mentioned Hurricane Earl being close to Africa in the news.
1 Chronicles 28:20 And David said to Solomon his son, Be strong and of good courage, and do [it]: fear not, nor be dismayed: for the LORD God, [even] my God, [will be] with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee, until thou hast finished all the work for the service of the house of the LORD.
This verse God really spoke to me this morning when i was reading my bible. It's the verse He used to call me to Africa. I prayed and asked Him to show me if He really is calling me to Africa and He said I want you to go to Africa.

In my junior year of High School people came to our US History class and told us about the Invisible Children in Uganda and Sudan.

Brother Chase told us about how they burn crops in Africa for a split second in a message he preached while pastor was gone.

Mrs Martin told us in Sunday school this morning(9/5/10) that we don’t have to go to Africa just surrender to it if God has asked you to, we were talking about Abraham and Isaac and how Abraham was told by God to sacrifice Isaac his only son.  She said we don’t have to go to Timbuktu, a place in Africa, and never see our mom and dad again, just surrender to go.  lol

Mrs Chase was talking about a book by Mrs Pearl about a helpmeet for him or something along that line and said something about your husband could be a visionary man who could up and go to Africa one month and then 2 months later go somewhere else, and she said some other things about the book as well.


There has been so much more Africa in my past that I cant even write it all down, and I am very sure that there will be more Africa in my future as well.

Missionary David Livingstone- heart buried in Africa.

Africa!!!

Last year sometime, around August I know for sure, August 25, 2010 (i had it written in my old Bible). I surrendered to go to Africa.  I had been feeling the call for a few weeks and even earlier in life I had felt the call but then I wrote it off as I wanted to go and not God calling me to go.

I remember all the missionaries who were going to Africa had slide show pictures and they would show them to us and it would move my heart and bring tears to my eyes, this girl (me) doesn't cry very much, and I remember this one picture of this boy who had lost his arm. His parents had AIDs and as a result he had it too, his parents died and he was an orphan.  He got saved and he had a huge smile on his face. So many people over in Africa have the same story, oh they may not have lost a limb or got saved but a lot of them have aids.  it's just sad.  People need the Lord.

through sin we forget God's call upon our lives, we have it in the back of our minds and for me when Africa would get brought up just randomly it would bring good thoughts to my mind and make me think of God's calling, but it didn't stir up the need to repent and get back on the firing line.

Last year sometime I was given a CD by a girl and it had Bury My Heart on the Mission Field and all throughout the song I pictured African people, the song never once mentions Africa but that was all that was on my heart.

At youth conference last year Brother Copeland preached (Brother Baldwin did too, but Bro Copeland was the one God used in this instance, though God used both) and he asked, I believe it was Brother Gaddis's youngest son, to come up to the altar to come and stand next to him. Brother Copeland knelt down next to the boy and dreamed about that little boy's future.  He said he could be a preacher some day or something else, or a missionary to Africa and that spoke to my heart because of all the Africa stuff that had been going on, I was seeing it everywhere, on TV, in preaching, just everywhere.  I didn't surrender that day, but a few weeks later I did surrender.

How are they going to hear if we don't go? Who is going to fill the missionaries shoes when they die and go on to Glory? Who will reach the African people if I don't? Yes I know that women don't preach and I don't want to be a preacher, God forbid that I'd want to be a preacher, but I know that I am to be the help meet to my husband whenever God sends that man along.  But a missionary can be someone who just shares the Gospel with the lost souls that need Christ.

Isn't it amazing how God can take something I wrote one year ago and bring about conviction and remind me what I surrendered to and bring about a burden.  Sunday morning Mrs Martin prayed with me and gave me some papers I wrote and gave to her to remind me of every once in awhile, she told me to read them again and I did and it's burdened my heart.

I don't know when God will send me my husband, and I don't know if I will make it to Africa, but as Mrs Martin has told me and others before you just have to surrender to go if God has told you to, it was in Sunday School that she told us and she was teaching on Abraham and Isaac and Abraham offering Isaac, she told us that we don't have to go to Timbuktu, a place in Africa, and never see our mom and dad again, just surrender to go if God has called you.  God sometimes wants us to just have faith in Him.  He won't ask of us more than we can bear or anything like that and He won't ask of us anything that He won't enable us to do and won't walk with us through.  Do I know if God will place me in Africa one day? No, I don't, but am I willing to go? Yes, I'm willing to go.

God is good to me.

God bless!!!
Mandy Marie